Friday fun: Playing the age game
Alouette Lake, BC (photo from trekearth.com)
Here is some Friday fun, the satirical and the mostly serious:
Being a theologically, philosophically, Biblically orientated Christian man in BC can be tricky business in the early 21st century. In my late 30s, I have been a student for 17 years, and have worked part-time in fields such as telemarketing, census, and security. Having mainly avoided the secular approach to life by God’s grace, my path has been quite different than most Christian women my age. In my studied opinion many Christians basically believe but live as non-believers do in many ways. I reason this is largely because by God’s will, for several reasons, many 21st century Christians do not value the serious study of Scripture and related fields. The Holy Spirit tends to mould and change persons through teaching and much of this takes place through study.
Now, I must apologize to the women reading this article as I realize many of my female blog readers are serious students of Scripture and related study.
I am hardly God’s gift to women, but I have had several women interested in me over the years, but just not suitable ones. Some of these women I have met on-line, but although I think one can have on-line friendship, I do not believe in a realistic romantic on-line relationship with a woman. I would have to meet a woman in person to have an idea if a romantic relationship was possible.
Are you interested in meeting me in person?
Okay, walk, jog, fly, drive, or take a boat or train to Maple Ridge, BC, Canada, which is the most northeastern part of the Lower Mainland. In the morning, head down the Lougheed Highway heading east to Toronto through the centre of town and where the Lougheed meets the By-Pass and look southwest for a glow coming from one of the residences. The glow should be my good friend Bobby Buff putting on his Crisco for the day to give him that bodybuilder ‘shine’. From his place, please head west down the hill and at the bottom of the hill I live in a condo. During the afternoon and evening you can look for me doing the David Bruce Banner (The Incredible Hulk) walk on the near-by streets. I may be praying or pondering on some intellectual issue. Five free blog comments to any young Christian woman willing to approach me.
As I have different life experience than most Christian women my age and have never found a relatable woman in a romantic context, I am disturbed at how many persons seem to think that by hypothetically ‘throwing’ someone my age at me will solve my problem, and that I should ‘grab’ her and date her. Some people just do not get it. Contrary to much societal propaganda, mutual attraction is not primarily about age and chronological maturity although I admit they are important factors, but it is mainly about shared worldview and experience. A woman can be 20 or 120, and we will relate if we have similar worldview and experience, although I am not attracted to much older women physically. If a woman is younger than me and shares my Christian worldview and is interested in Biblical studies, theology, and philosophy, especially from a conservative Reformed view, we may relate and there may be mutual attraction. Some people whine to me that even though I would like to have children one day, and lack sexual experience I should not expect to date or marry someone younger. Well, if a woman of any age is not attracted to me, fine, most women will not be attracted to any one particular man, but that does not mean I should go after someone close to my own age because we will relate better, which is not necessarily true, or because that is the pragmatic thing to do. Pragmatism should be part of romantic relationships, but there still has to be basic spiritual, intellectual, and physical mutual attraction.
I study at times some relationship teaching, both Christian and secular. One interesting secular teacher, that I am not endorsing necessarily, states concerning the idea of women dating older men:
CATEGORIES AND CATEGORIES
I've found that women usually fit into one of
the following three categories when it comes to
how they view this topic:
1) "It's perfectly normal" (Maybe 20%)
2) "It's taboo, and very intriguing" (Maybe 20%)
3) "It's GROSS!" (Maybe 60%)
As I do not share the sexual and romantic experience of most women my age, and would like my own children one day, and am not interested in becoming a stepfather, unless the children are little, I have emailed on Christian dating sites some younger women over the years. Some women are offended, but if I am going to find a relatable Christian young woman I need to try even if as little as 20% or slightly more of Christian women would be open-minded concerning the age issue.
Frankly, I would much rather be alone than simply date and marry someone within secular societal standards, as my worldview and experience is outside of those standards.
I reason that some in the Christian Church would be more offended if I dated and eventually married a significantly younger woman with a similar level of romantic experience (probably more than I would have), hoping to potentially have children one day, than they would be with two homosexuals marrying!
Please ponder on that statement.
Interesting, from my research I have found that many Asian and African women are not near as concerned romantically with age difference, and the same can be stated for Eastern Europeans, although less so. The age issue is at least somewhat a Western construct.
Is there such as thing as too much of an age differece? It most cases yes, but this would be dealt with by the fact that there would not be mutual attraction and therefore an unwritten, unofficial socially constructed rule concerning age difference in romantic relationships is not needed.
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