Stolen questionnaires

BC farm (photo from Ron Niebrugge)

UPDATE: Questionnaires found, March 18, 2007
Now the church has two sets.;)


I was out in rural east Maple Ridge by car with a friend Sunday, dropping off some problem of evil questionnaires at a church, before heading to our own church in Vancouver. According to the minister, the questionnaires that were placed by me outside the front door of his church prior to the service Sunday have been stolen. The questionnaires were in a yellow package and in a transparent plastic bag. It was raining heavily outside, but they were put in a dry area. Previously before dropping the package off, my friend drove into the parking lot of a neighbouring church thinking it was the Church that I needed to go to. This church featured a German Shepherd cross watch dog who was barking fiercely at us. Here are some possible explanations for the missing questionnaires. Please feel free to add some other ideas in the comments. I have to return to the church next Sunday to drop off a new set of questionnaires.

1. The German Shepherd cross waited until we left and then violently attacked and ate the questionnaires in a fit of rage.

2. A passerby saw the yellow package and removed it from the plastic bag and then used the plastic bag as rain headgear.

3. Some sweet soul is photocopying the questionnaires for me and is taking them to as many Christian churches as possible, as my mailing address is on each questionnaire.

4. A person noticed the package and upon opening it thought that it was a great idea for a PhD. The person is now going to try and write a 60,000 page PhD dissertation to match the questionnaire. My method was to write the theory first and then the questionnaire, but to each his own I guess. I do not want to be judgmental here!

5. The questionnaires were taken in order to place my email address, which is also on the document, on a list which can be sold to foreign companies in order that I can receive more email job offers to work in China.

6. A person living in the country is unwilling to go to an ophthalmologist all the way in "downtown" Maple Ridge to have the eyes checked of family members. This person is instead using the AS A NC D DS as an eye chart by holding the questionnaires at different distances to check the eye sight of family members.

7. A person is using the questionnaires for the rough drafts of an up and coming problem of evil comic strip series.

8. A person or persons used the questionnaires to start a fire to cook some local road kill.

9. The questionnaires were taken to a local paper recycling depot and gleefully accepted by the honest and sharp employee.

10. A person or persons opened the package and seeing that I attend the University of Wales, mailed them back to the United Kingdom.

11. Toilet paper?

12. A person or persons thought the problem of evil could be demonstrated by stealing the questionnaires.


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