How to blow-up your blog without thinking too much
Okay, I need a break from all the Facebook and Blogger material concerning:
a) Obama nation
I have made my views known in the previous article, and I remain the non-conformist who will never run for office and would not be elected if I did, in all likelihood.
I do not claim to have hugely successful blogs, and so I do not approach this article with overconfidence or arrogance. At best, my blogs satire and theology and thekingpin68 are moderately successful, and that is largely thanks to my readers, commenters and links.
Thank you! Please read them often.
I have been blogging with thekingpin68 since 2004 and this blog since 2006. Here from my research are some satirical ways to blow-up your blog without thinking too much.
1. One of the most 'attractive' things to see when I go through Blogger's next blog option is dark theme headings and graphics featuring 666, Charles Manson, death metal, Chucky (no not my friend) demonic and occult material. That is it, give your new readers that very warm and cozy safe feeling right from the start. There is nothing like jolting the readers to get them coming back again and again. Better yet if you can have some death metal music blaring at a very high volume right from the start you will make a tremendous mental (metal) impact on your new readers. And of course always feature tons of blood, 'people love that'. I am sure these bloggers can find a 'wide range' of blog supporters. I would suggest that one look to prisons, insane asylums, and reform schools for blog links.
Revelation 20: 14-15
14Then (AW)death and Hades were thrown into (AX)the lake of fire This is the (AY)second death, the lake of fire.
15And if anyone's name was not found written in (AZ)the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire.
2. When someone leaves a comment on your blog, either completely ignore the comment, or better yet erase it later after it has been published. Make sure you come across to your readers with that 'What the hell do you want', type of attitude. Treat your blog commenters like they are telemarketers while your favourite television show is on.
3. Use plenty of ad hominem personal attacks in all your articles and comments. If someone disagrees with you make sure you state that they must hate you and what you stand for with your blog. Imply you are the Blogosphere's Mother Teresa/Gandhi/non-resistant Mennonite as you use vicious ad hominem attacks against your readers that disagree with you in any major way.
Reason that it is okay for you to viciously attack your critics, because you are 'right' and since they are 'wrong' as they disagree with you, and they obviously must hate you.
4. Put on your righteous blogger hat and decide which comments from commenters contain sufficient truth and only publish those. If you think a comment is truthful enough, publish, and if you do not, do not publish. After all, it is your blog and you have the right to have only comments that you agree with on your blog. That is what Canada (or your Western country) is all about, eh.
Matthew 22: 36-40
36"Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?"
37And He said to him, " '(AC)YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.'
38"This is the great and foremost commandment.
39"The second is like it, '(AD)YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.'
40"(AE)On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets."
Mark 12: 28-31
28(Q)One of the scribes came and heard them arguing, and (R)recognizing that He had answered them well, asked Him, "What commandment is the foremost of all?"
29Jesus answered, "The foremost is, '(S)HEAR, O ISRAEL! THE LORD OUR GOD IS ONE LORD;
30(T)AND YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND, AND WITH ALL YOUR STRENGTH.'
31"The second is this, '(U)YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.' There is no other commandment greater than these."
5. Even if you are not famous and well-known in your field with plenty of blog traffic almost immediately, do not make comments on other blogs as even though you are relatively unknown in the field you are blogging in others should see what a brilliant and wonderful person you are. People should be able to find your blog via Google. I mean that is what Google is for, is it not?
6. Forget about linking reciprocally with other blogs and websites as eventually the blogosphere will come to find your blog and traffic will greatly increase as the truth will be revealed that you are a blogging 'supastaw'.
Supastaw that is what you aw.
In the meantime, writing that on-line personal diary is oh so much fun. It is like a notebook accept on-line with all those pretty bright colours.
7. Come across as a real know-it-all. Be so closed-minded and stuck to a certain use of terms that unless someone completely agrees with you and uses all the same terminology, imply they must be ignorant, and therefore if you do publish their comment, lecture them in a very condescending manner. Pretend they are your four year child that has just had a boo boo in the pants after being potty trained.
This has been published previously, but it needs to be published often I am afraid.
Douglas Walton explains that argumentation ad hominem is an argument against the man. It is a personal attack against an arguer to refute the argument. In the abusive form the character of the arguer is attacked. These arguments are often used to attack an opponent unfairly. Walton (1996: 374). Simon Blackburn notes that ad hominem is attempting to disprove what a person is stating by attacking the person, or less commonly by praising the person. Commonly it is a way of arguing forcefully or not, against a view without advancing the counter argument. Blackburn (1996: 24). This latter concept would be that of arguing against a held perspective without making any reasonable counter-arguments.
BLACKBURN, SIMON (1996) Oxford Dictionary of Philosophy, Oxford, Oxford University Press.
WALTON, DOUGLAS (1996) ‘Informal Fallacy’, in Robert Audi, (ed), The Cambridge Dictionary of Philosophy, Cambridge, Cambridge University Press.
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